Saturday, April 18, 2009

a Broken FOOL.....



if you read my blog, if you've read a few entries of my blog then you know that i don't just blog about the shop. i often blog about the insanity inside my head. maybe that is about my shop though? because it's out of that insanity box that comes my ideas for new pieces, new drawings, new photos, new uses for a train case etc.

either way, not the point of this post.
my all time FAVORITE quote, it inspired this post

"Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable."
C.S. Lewis

i know i wear my heart on my sleeve. i know it irritates people. i know i will be a target for certain people to hate. i was recently called brave.... and it really got the wheels in my head churning more than usual. sometimes i feel brave but most of the time i feel foolish.
but here's the thing,
i'd rather be an honest FOOL if there is ANY remote possibility of my honesty helping another to feel less alone, than unbreakable and safe in my casket.
some people may not understand me, why i chose to write the things i write. sometimes that bothers me. but when i stop- really STOP and think about it- i wouldn't change a thing. i will keep on coming back for more of the punches because it's worth it.
because i'd never want to let go of feeling love.
i've felt the pull of general malaise quite often in my life.
and i can say with absolute certainty,
that feeling nothing at all is

far worse
than feeling intense pain.
love hard, love even though it will hurt sometimes.

and that's all i am going to say for now.......

Thursday, April 16, 2009

SLACKER KID PART 2


no, this doesn't count as a real post- more of a continuation of my SLACKER KID post from yesterday..... just 3 more shots i had fun shooting, thought i would share.
i will get back on this blogging thing
for real......
take em or leave em

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

SLACKER KID!

this is absolutely unacceptable- my blogging is shameful! i've neglected this space so much i'm surprised i was even allowed to log in and type here. a really good post is coming i promise.....
wedding ideas and graduation gifts galorrrrrrrrre.
for now i will leave you with some incredibly fun shots i have taken over the past few days.
all my apologies for being such a slacker kid!


Thursday, March 26, 2009

Lucky Lobes

look what I GOT! just take a gander......
like a kid in a candy shop with a smackdown of REBEL!

candyears

so the above earrings are from the fantastically talented AMY at
www.ThePeachTree.etsy.com
now, these are all going to be gifts- 3 for my mother, 1 for my awesome assistant who just bought herself a pair of rockin YELLOW vans. these treats are going to make my lovelies very happy. their LOBES ARE GONNA BE A SHOUTIN'!
if i could wear earrings these would be what i'd be wearing. but seriously, if you could see me these days...... i get so excited and frantically artistic that i actually run into walls when i move from room to room because i don't take the time to think about things spacially. knowing me i would get these things caught the latches of a new suitcase and probably rip off my entire lobe. oh wow, gettin to graphic.
POINT IS:
who doesn't want a little color in their lives? these gems are fabulous for everyday or a night out. for adults and kids. they are dazzzzzzzling. they are NOT to eat but yo may find yourself attempting to put them in your mouth as it's watering for a jolly-rancher.
go buy
a pair for your mom, a pair for your best friend, and a pair for yourself!
because not only are these pieces GORGEOUS but they are affordable.
thank you amy, for making us all able to let our inner rockstar out at a price completely justifiable!

Monday, March 23, 2009

feeling faint....

do you ever feel like giving up?

on getting up, on moving forward? do you ever just lack the will?
and i'm not just talking about etsy. life on this earth in general can be a living hell.
so often feelings don't match up with the facts.
sometimes emotions hit you like a train barreling at a speed far too fast.
and it's so hard to separate what's legitimate and what's foolishness. i've got supportive people in my life, i've got soo much, i've been given more than enough but still i'm beaten down.
i'm not playing with a full deck right now so my emotions are ALL over the place. it's all i can do to hang on. the negative thoughts can be so dang invasive. in the front of my mind i know it's vital to keep the mentality of "this will pass" and "push forward"...... but what happens when lose your grip on these thoughts? i feel like i'm fumbling around for something in a pitch-black room- and on top of that i think i'm looking in the wrong room.
i feel like i've just come undone.
thank you EVERYONE for your support, for your CONSTANT friendship and encouragement, for the time you spend writing me a note here and there. for your life-giving love. i get overwhelmed when i can't pour out a fraction of what you've all given me. again, i stop and remind myself- that if i weren't me, and i was looking in on my situation i would tell me, don't worry- that's what friends are for. but we are always 10 times harder on ourselves right?
some photos- some old old old old photos.
(for the Anonymous person who keeps emailing me and telling me how i need to think about others and that i'm pouting and there are people more talented out there- please- just leave me alone. you don't know me, you only know what i choose to share on here and other places on the web- you only know a sliver of my life, of what i've been through, of the whole picture. so i beg you- please, just leave me be. hate me and think all the negative thoughts you want but do not share them with me. it's unbearable)

Sunday, March 22, 2009

ummmmmmmmmm

seriously, i should NOT be allowed to make videoblogs! it's pathetic the amount of times i say ummmmm...... i hope you are laughing- i had to make this to show my pure idiocy!


Saturday, March 21, 2009

it's video time again.....

hi eveyone! no dance moves this time- sorry.
and to NestaHome i say NestaHome.com when in reality it's www.NESTAHOME.etsy.com
sorry about that friend:)
have a great rest of the weekend
again, DOUBLE CLICK SO YOU CAN SEE THE WHOLE SCREEN!!!